Saturday, March 30, 2013

Flavor #1: Brown Sugar Cinnamon

Brown Sugar Cinnamon is probably the most popular of all pop-tarts, so I felt it was appropriate to start with this one (and because it was already in my house). I mean, I've never met a person who doesn't like them, but I am sure there people like that out here. We should pray for them.

Anway, when I walked downstairs this morning, there was one pack of cinnamon left in the box which I was told was left for me, as my little sister stated, "for your stupid blog". How rude! Anyway, I opened the pack and made sure that the pop-tart had not been broken, because that's just annoying, dropped it in the toaster and waited. (You can eat them without using a toaster, but that kind of takes the "pop" out of the "tart", if you know what I mean.)

After about three minutes, the pop-tarts were ready and they smelled awesome! I laid them gingerly on a paper towel, and said a blessing (cuz that's what I do), then got back up because I forgot to pour myself a glass of milk, then sat back down and started to pray again, but then remembered I already did, and then, finally, I ate.

Now, everyone eats their pop-tarts differently and I have no intention of trying every single way to make my judgement on the flavor. That's just ridicules. So, my way is simply to break a part of the pop-tart and let it soak in the milk for a couple of seconds (I believe this is called "dunking"). When the pop-tart is just soggy enough, I consume it and its perfection.

And here's why: brown sugar cinnamon has really good crust. I mean, the icings great, but the icing with the crust is just so good. Sometimes I wish they just had a plain pop-tart with brown sugar cinnamon's crust (which they probably do). It always taste better soggy since it doesn't have jelly in the middle and is more on the dry side. On top of that, dunking it makes it cool on the outside and warm on the inside. Yum. So if you don't dunk for some lame I-Don't-Want-To-Eat-Messy-'Cus-I-Eat-Like-A-Bird reason then you should try it anyway. Yolo, people.

So, here's what I have to say about Flavor #1:
Toasted? Yes
Milk? Hell yeah!
Icing? Scrumptious!
Crust? LOVE
Filling? Yummy, but dry if you don't have milk
Overall score? 8

Can't wait to hear what flavor the rest of you write about (which is currently just Therese).
Good luck and may the odds be ever in your flavor.


Wednesday, March 27, 2013

Pop-Tart Patrol: The Dream

Pop-Tarts: Imagine the world without them. They are the friendliest food. Even on your downest of days, they are extremely perky whether it be by their colorful frosting or when they pop out of the toaster and fill your kitchen with a sweet savory smell. They can be eaten at any time of day for any meal (although doctors and other stingy healthy people might disagree). Or for a late night snack. Or something to grab on the go. OR even for a simple dessert. They can be eaten cold and hard or, after a brief trip in the toaster, warm and gooey. They are perfect for dunking and one of milk's greatest companions (second to oreo's). They are perhaps one of the greatest inventions of man kind.

Anyway, I hope you have read that all in dramatic narrator voice (preferably Morgan Freeman's).

The pop-tart patrol idea was inspired by a dream. A dream I had whilst sleeping on my sofa. I dreamt that my mother had bought every flavor of Pop-tarts and I couldn't figure out which one I wanted for breakfast.

And then it occurred to me that I haven't tried all the flavors and even though I say brown sugar cinnamon is my favorite, how can you know until you've tried them all?

One thing led to another and it suddenly became my new life goal to try every flavor of pop-tart and decide, at the end of my endeavor, which is my favorite. This will be a difficult journey. Only the strong will survive (although I do not advise anyone with diabetes, cancer, slow metabolism and/or poison ivy to participate in this adventure). If you do not suffer from these conditions, or you just don't care, join us.

Good luck and may the odds be ever in your flavor.

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